Good baby?

People always ask me, "Is he a good baby?" and I never know how to answer.

I've been to 2 new mom groups in the past week. I decided to go to be social and maybe try to meet other moms in the area. I only have a limited amount of time before I have to go back to work, but I like being able to socialize and talk to other people going through the same thing I am.

After both groups, I came home in shock. The stories I heard were not what I expected at all! We would compare stories about sleeping, breastfeeding, crying, etc. and I was so surprised to hear how much worse the other moms had it!

When we talked about sleeping babies, I said that Connor usually sleeps 4 or 5 hours at a time at night. He's usually pretty easy to get to sleep except for the pacifier fight (in and out). I had no idea how lucky I was until the other moms explained how they hardly get any sleep and their babies sleep for maybe 2 hours at a time. A lot of them talked about how it's hard to take a shower or get anything done some days. I totally get it, but I guess I'm pretty lucky that I can shower every day (if I want to), I can do laundry, and I can get the dishes done.

Things aren't all peachy and Connor does have his cranky time in the late afternoon. He usually won't stop crying and nothing will help calm him down. But I'm very thankful it happens during the day and not at night!

We also talked a lot about breastfeeding. A lot of the moms said they were shocked at how hard and painful it was. I felt really dumb saying it wasn't that painful at all for me. Yes, it hurts for 30 seconds, but it really isn't as bad as I thought. I completely agreed that it's hard work, it's tiring, and it's hard to plan your life in 3 hour increments. Connor is a latching pro so I was dumbfounded as I watched a couple moms try to breastfeed. Their babies were kicking and crying in the middle of feeding which made it very difficult for the moms.

At the mom group sponsored by the hospital and run by a nurse, there was only one other mom. She obsessed over feeding and seemed to have a really hard time with it. She was so concerned with what other people were telling her and things she read in books that she was driving herself crazy. It was hard not to roll my eyes listening to how crazy she was. When the nurse started to suggest another way of thinking and some ideas about how to make it easier, I would nod my head. Everything she suggested was exactly the way I was doing things. So when they would ask me how I did it, all I could say was that I was following her suggestions and everything was working pretty well. At the end, the nurse said to me, "You guys seem pretty content." Yeah, I guess we are! I just had no idea!

I did want to spend some time talking about the pacifier with the nurse to get her opinions on it. I told her how I didn't want to have to use it, but Connor needs something in his mouth ALL the time. I worry about him having bad teeth later or being super attached to it until he's 10. She made me feel a lot better about using it. She actually said it can be a really good thing that he has something that calms him. A lot of babies don't have a magic thing that makes them happy. She also said his teeth should be fine because his mouth is still growing and they'll correct themselves once he stops using it. So now I don't feel as bad about having to use it. My goal is to try to have him rely on it a little less, but I'm not super concerned if he needs it a lot now.

The one thing that the other moms do have going for them is that most of them are not going back to work. I'd love to work part-time, but that just won't happen. I have to remind myself that we bought this house with the plan that I would continue to work. I want Connor to have a good life and provide him with everything he needs. I want him to go to college and be able to pay for him to go. So like my parents, it might not always be easy, but I'm doing it for him.

So now when people ask me if he's a good baby, I know my answer should be YES. I'm very lucky to have a such a great baby.